I'M SORRY. DID YOU SAY SOMETHING ABOUT CRAWFISH?

May's Yat Together was Wednesday at Ignatius, site of last year's June meeting that ranked No. 1 in my top five Yat-Togethers. We've sort of run out of new places. Plus, I've really wanted to go back there and haven't.

The guest list was small this month: me, Kelli, Greg and Bode. What are you going to do? I called Christina to see if she was coming because I hadn't heard from her. She says no. Christina was supposed to get married in Mexico at the beginning of the month but didn't because of some flu thing or something.

Me: So, is next Saturday's reception going to be the wedding as well now?
Christina: Yes.
Me: Does that change the dress code?
Christina: What did you think it was before?
Me: Pajamas.

Seriously, though, it looks like I'm going to have to tuck in my pants and wear a tie now. Total bummer, dude.

I had settled on ordering some type of salad (which Kelli called boring) when the waiter came over and showed us the specials written on the board above us.

Me: What is crawfish Ignatius?
Waiter: It's a pasta served with crawfish and (something about a sauce)?
Me: Sold!

The sauce was some good. Loved the dish. Want to get it again. Went real well with my Abita Amber followed by a Barqs in the bottle.

On a congratulatory note, Greg is graduating from law school Friday. Mad props. We ask him if he's going out to celebrate this weekend so that we might partake.

Greg: Not this weekend. Next weekend. This weekend, I have to do all this family bullshit.

To summarize, next Friday could be a wild night of celebrating with Greg. Then, I'm off for both weekend days. Saturday is Christina's wedding/reception. And on Sunday, we rest.

THE TINA CURSING CORNER

My mom and I watched the fourth disc of Season 3 of Lost separately. We discussed it when I woke up Thursday.
-- On the Kate-Jack relationship: "Juliette told Kate that Jack saw her fucking Sawyer. Ha."
-- On the Juliette flashback: "She was fucking Ethan. I was like, 'What the fuck?' Disgusting."
Me: "No. That was Goodwin."
Mom: "Oh, fuck."
-- On Jack trusting Juliette: "What the fuck is Jack thinking?"
-- On burying Nicki alive: "She's not fucking dead."
-- On Locke falling eight stories: "I was always wondering how the fuck he got in the wheelchair."

On Lie to Me, they show pictures of famous people caught in the act with different facial expressions each episode. Mom loves this and tries to see if she knows the famous people. "I wish they put their fucking names next to their pics." She can't figure out somebody this week. "Who is that? It's um, President fuck." (I think it was Jimmy Carter.)

BEAT L.A., WELCOME BACK AND HISTORY

1) The Rockets. Man, this team just won't go down without a fight. Well, if you pretend like Game 5 didn't happen. I only ask that they be in the game at least until midway through the third quarter on Sunday. That's all. There are three litmus tests still remaining in this series:

a) Aaron Brooks. In all three wins, he's been excellent. In all three losses, he's been bad.
b) Lakers 3-point shooting. They went 5-of-21 Thursday and lost. Now, if we can just get Ariza, Odom and Farmar to put up some bricks in Los Angeles.
c) The first quarter. In all 12 Rockets playoff games, the team who won the first quarter, won the game. How do you describe that stat? By golly, I've got it. It's amazing. So amazing. It's amazing.

2) Jason Taylor. Hello my friend, we meet again. It's been awhile, where should we begin? Feels like forever. (The previous three sentences were Creed lyrics. Sorry about that.) Love having him back. Just feels right, ya know?

3) My dentist repeated something Tuesday that I've heard many times in the past few weeks. I finally said something about it.

Dentist: What happened to the Hornets? 58 points. That was embarrassing.
Me: You're not using the right word. It was historic.

PARTING SHOTS
Liam is telling Marcus about betting on horses.

Marcus: What's a wheel?
Me: Well, they're round, and four of them usually are on a car.
Marcus: Liam, hit him for me.

At dinner, there's a discussion about a group of early-morning runners.

Someone: Does Varney (a writer) run?
Stephen: No. He's not a runner.
Phil: He's a run-on sentence.

Liam and I are discussing the Preakness.

Me: You betting on Rachel Alexandra?
Liam: I don't think you can get off her.

Marcus tells me to add another story to page 3 using a specific technique.

Marcus: Calvin Borel just got his 900th win. Do you know how to box a story?
Me: I don't know how to box at all.
Marcus: That's why you always getting your ass kicked.

THE DAILY TOP LIST
As Tina said the other day, summertime is fucking here. And that means snowballs are in season. Here are my top five flavors.

5) Bubble gum.
I can walk to the nearest snowball stand. Went there last night, and the same lady from when I was 5-years-old is still behind the counter.

4) Wedding cake.
Tastes just like the pastry.

3) Strawberry.
What I do is sip all the juice out through the straw, then smash up the rest until there's more juice and repeat.

2) Watermelon.
No seeds.

1) Dreamsicle.
The place where I first had this is now a lot with a trailer on it.