CHAPTER FOUR: DOUBLE DATING 

Where we left off: I told Kelly to set up a date for me with one of her co-workers while Megan was on Christmas break in Colorado. 

For the next three days before this date, I was walking around with two little Genes on my shoulders: one dressed with a white robe and sporting a halo and the other holding a pitchfork with horns. 

The angel kept preaching that I was cheating and needed to call off the date. The devilish one had an evil grin and continued to say: When the cat's away, the mouse will play. My solution, as usual, was somewhere in the middle.

Reasons for going through with the date: 1) My relationship with Megan wasn't serious. 2) I was 50/50 at that time on whether to dump her. So, why pass up a date? (Amazing that it's easier to get a date once you're already in a relationship. Weird fact.) 

Still, I couldn't get Megan and the feeling of possibly cheating out of my system during the date, which was a double date on a Friday with Kelly and Bert at Ground Pati. After the meal, we all went back to my house and played Scattergories. 

Sylvia wasn't smoking hot as Kelly described. That didn't surprise me as Kelly is a classic exaggerator. But she was attractive. And smart. And fun. At the end of the night, we hugged, and I felt like it went well. 

On Sunday night, I had a thirty-minute phone conversation with Megan. I followed that up with a thirty-minute talk with Sylvia. I think I was starting to enjoy playing two games at once, like those Internet poker players you read about. 

There was never a second date with Sylvia, who apparently had talked to Kelly about nipping that in the bud. I ask Kelly to tell me the truth about what went wrong. Kelly: "She said she felt like you weren't that into it, and that made her not that into it." 

This was true. On the date and during our chats, I was always hesitant to make a move or tell her that I was into her. Something felt wrong about doing that. (Yeah, you moron. Cheating.) 

Who could blame Sylvia? I thought since she requested the meeting, she would be into me enough for me to have time to make a decision between the two. I figured she wouldn't notice my half-into-it manner. Oh, Gene. So much to learn. 

Anyway, my hesitation with Sylvia (Yes, Marcus. I blew it.) showed me two things: 1) I'm not one to fully cheat and 2) Perhaps I did care for Megan. It was then that I decided to make a go of it with her. I couldn't wait for her to return. 

We were getting along famously at the start of the spring semester. It felt like we were having a real beginning to a relationship and had veered off the fast-moving path we started down. One night, I was heading to the casino to get rid of that itch. Megan came for company. 

She's sitting behind me as I'm playing poker (I had just won a hand with pocket kings) when I turn to see if she's getting bored yet. 

Me: You doing OK? 

Megan: Yeah. I'm watching the skiing. 

Me (looking at the TV): You cheering for this guy?

Megan: Yes.

Me: Really? He's wearing pink. Why would you cheer for him? 

Megan: But I love pink. Why would you say that? (Getting a little mad.) Who is it that doesn't like pink?

Me: Uh ...

(Sylvia hated pink. Hated it. Mixed 'em up. Classic two-timing mistake. Oops.)

TO BE CONTINUED. ...

THE TINA CURSING CORNER

My mom was preparing for the party tomorrow as I'm waking up. I hear: "Shit. Dammit, I did it. Son of a bitch." (I feared that meant the cake was messed up, but it's fine. I'm not sure what actually went wrong.) 

Mom is anxious for some of her premium channel TV shows to come out on DVD. "Where's fucking Weeds and Californication? Fucking 24 came out the next day." 

Mom is watching Vantage Point. She doesn't like the beginning. "Oh, this is bullshit. I can't watch this kind of fucking movie. Get to the fucking thing." (She gave up on it.)

Mom describes her famous Tiny Tina Turkey sandwiches. "It's fucking turkey and mayo. On fucking bread."

PARTING SHOTS

Lopes is reading headlines on ESPN.com Friday night.

Lopes: Listen to this one. 'Yankees try Wang in bullpen.' 

Bake: They got a lot of time on their hands down there.

Brick gets a call from downstairs because we didn't log Page 3. 

Me: I didn't log it? 

Brick: Nope. 

Me: Sorry. I'm still getting used to this new button. 

JRap: That's what she said. 

THE DAILY TOP LIST

With the "Denver Debacle" making the news this week, I got to thinking of other times wrestling has made it into the mainstream flow of conversation. Here's the top 5: 

5) Boxer vs. wrestler. June 26, 1976.

Antonio Inoki took on Muhammad Ali in Japan, and fans in America could watch it on close-circuit TV by going to the event of their local promotion. Ali got $6 million for the fight, and it was all the rage at the time. 

Historically for wrestling, however, the fight was seen as a flop. It was a draw. But still, it was Ali competing in a wrestling setting. 

4) Steroid scandals. 

This decade, steroid stories in sports have dominated the headlines. However, in the early 90s, Vince McMahon went to federal court on steroid charges. Hulk testified against him. Big deal. Then, steroids have been linked to so many wrestling deaths, it's hard to ignore its impact on the wrestling limelight. An article in SI two years ago linked 10 stars to steroids. 

3) The Attitude Era. 

In the late 90s, wrestling had a big boom. Ratings hit an all-time high. Wrestlers were on the cover of TV guide. They had the NWO, DX, Stone Cold, the Rock. There was a Super Bowl commercial, and every kid and their grandma was watching. 

2) Chris Benoit's death. And his family, too.

The two-year anniversary is coming up. I couldn't go anywhere that week without hearing people talk about that. Is it OK to laugh now about the fact that they aired a two-hour tribute show about his career before learning what actually happened? 

1) Hulkamania. 

Led to WrestleMania I and, subsequently, WrestleMania 25. Led to Vince becoming a billionaire. Led to unprecedented popularity. Led to rock 'n wrestling on MTV. What else? Uh, Hogan Knows Best.