FATHER'S DAY

On Sunday, Tina grilled country style ribs and more important, two sirloins for my dad and me. We started off with some Cesar salad and had garlic bread with our steaks. Yummy.

I had been looking forward to this since I convinced Tina to hook this up about two weeks ago. She didn't disappoint. Did I mention that we had chocolate cake, too?

As we were finishing up lunch, Tina said: "You have yet to wish your father a Happy Father's Day."
Me: That doesn't really need to be said does it?
Tina: Bullshit!

Among our topics for the rest of the afternoon were Panama City, LSU-Texas, the 1978 Rummel basketball team and Fleetwood Mac.

I had the rest of the steak for dinner. So for three full meals, the steak cost about $22. I'll never order it from a restaurant again.

THE TINA CURSING CORNER

We noticed that my front passenger tire has a small problem. My mom demands I get it fixed immediately. "That tire is almost a year old."
Me: I'm right on top of that, Rose.
Tina: You have a fucking egg in your tire!

Mom feels the need to criticize my driving from Saturday night. "You switched three fucking lanes at once. That's illegal." (Is it really?)

The Covington jail escapee that mom was waiting to climb her fence the other day was in the paper again. "They caught the motherfucker."

DID YOU KNOW?

Did you know that Iran had elections last week and Twitter was useful for democracy? Did you know that Sammy Sosa cheated? Even before the reports last week? Did you know that the new Transformers movie comes out this week? Did you know that Jon and Kate are divorcing?

PARTING SHOTS
The Hornets need to improve their depth in the frontcourt.

Marcus: We need a backup center who can shoot. How bout Jayson Williams? He has good aim.

There was a problem with the baseballs in Monday's CWS matchup.

Mike Patrick: "The balls in the umpire's sack are wet."

An LSU player ducks from a ball near his face in the ninth inning.

Marcus: Let that smack you in the face.
Lopes: That's what Ted said.

THE DAILY TOP LIST
The top five rhyming slogans for this segment.

5) If you need an assist,
read the Daily Top List.

4) The Daily Top List
gets straight to the gist.

3) Unclench your fist,
read the Daily Top List.

2) I exist for the Daily Top List.

1) Don't slit your wrist,
absorb the Daily Top List.