Where we left off: I decided to end it with Megan after her frantic drunken phone call in the rain at 3:30 a.m. I make a plan to let her down gently over a nice meal.
On Tuesday, January 29th, 2008, I went to pick up Megan for our "date" after a meeting with the big boss at work. We never made it to dinner.
After parking down the street from campus, I made the walk to Megan's dorm and took some deep breaths in preparation of breaking her heart. She was already standing at the turnaround pick-up circle thing.
Megan: "I thought you were picking me up."
Me: "Oh. I thought I was supposed to come get you and walk to my car."
(She was probably right. I thought about how to break-up with her so much that I forgot the details of the plans.)
Megan: "That's OK. We can walk."
Me: "Yeah. We should go for a walk anyway."
Megan (with sad puppy eyes): "Is it a (sniffle) bad walk?"
Me (slight nod): "Yeah. I'm afraid so."
Megan, poor thing, immediately started crying and pretty much didn't stop for the next 30 minutes outside Loyola's main dorm residence at 8 p.m. So, it's not like anybody heard or saw us. Whew.
Not wanting to tell her the real reason I was breaking up with her (whoreness, stupidness, other-nesses), I told her that I wasn't ready to take the next step and was thus ending it now. She didn't buy it. Who would?
Besides her continuous crying and incessant begging for the real breakup reason, here are some of the things dear, sweet Megan said/yelled at me during this process.
-- "I had a feeling I was getting dumped today. I told all my friends. I just knew it."
-- "First my cat dies. Now, this. What else could go wrong this week?"
-- "At first, I didn't even like you. Then, I gave you a chance and fell for you. Now, you go and break my heart. Well, you'll miss me soon and come crawling back, but I won't take you."
-- "Good luck with your gambling addiction!"
-- "I thought you were different. You were the only thing good in my life. I never thought you could do this to me. I know it hasn't been that long, but I thought you were really special. Well, not anymore!"
When I finally thought I had gotten her to calm down (I told myself I wouldn't leave until she stopped crying), I tried to say something, anything to get out and go home. However, she told me (as I made a motion to head back to my car) that she was going for a drive herself.
Megan: I'm just going to get in my car and go.
Me: Where?
Megan: Doesn't matter. Anywhere. I'm just going to drive real fast until I run out of gas. That'll make me forget about you.
Me: That might get you in some real trouble. I don't think that's a good idea.
Megan: Well, you can't tell me what to do.
She stormed off (still with tears all over her face), and I knew I could do nothing to stop her. Still, I had to do something. This trip sounded a wee bit dangerous. So, I called Lopes, he called her friends, and they caught her before she took off by herself.
I never talked to Megan again.
THE END.
THE TINA CURSING CORNER
I retrieve the newspaper early Sunday morning. To my mom, I don't close the door behind me fast enough. "You letting in bugs and shit."
The bag is wet, and I struggle to extract the paper from it. "May I ask you what the fuck you're doing with the paper?"
I tell mom something about Spencer. "You know more about that shit, and you don't even watch it. What the fuck's up with that?"
Mom was appalled about the story of the 17-year-old who raped and killed the 8-month-old. "No where to stick it in. Let me jam it in the baby's ass. He tried to tell police he was just wiping the shit off the ass."
OMAHA A GEAUX
My thoughts on the Tigers after they clinched their 15th appearance in the CWS.
1) Last year's team was more exciting. I think this year's squad is better, though. Two aces and a balanced lineup. Plus, a reliable closer. Can you say the formula for a title?
2) The past three trips to Omaha have sucked. (Except beating Rice in dramatic fashion last year.) Hopefully, the kiddies can get rid of that stink next week. I recommend air freshener.
3) Memo to Coach Paul Mainieri: Play Helenihi at third. Pretty please. That freshman Hanover scares me. Helenihi has a hot bat (2-run single in Game 1 vs. Rice, homer in Game 2) and can make more plays on defense than Hanover. So, Derek struggled early. That be long gone now, yo.
4) Coleman is like the Tyler Hansbrough of college baseball. Came back for his senior season because he loves the school. Leads team to the Final Four/CWS. Just one step left.
PARTING SHOT
Late Saturday night, we discuss how only four people are working Sunday.
Me: Foursome.
Sandy: Eww.
Bake: Bring a deck of cards. We'll play bridge.
THE DAILY TOP LIST
My favorite five actresses in their 30s.
5) Charlize Theron. 33.
When I fell for her: Curse of the Jade Scorpion.
4) Kate Beckinsale. 35.
When I fell for her: Click.
3) Isla Fisher. 33.
When I fell for her: Wedding Crashers.
2) Eva Mendes. 35.
When I fell for her: Hitch.
1) Reese Witherspoon. 33.
When I fell for her: Legally Blonde.
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