NEVER LEAVE HOME WITHOUT THEM.

On Monday afternoon, I still could feel the effects of Saturday night's debauchery. Not so much in my head. I didn't have a headache. I felt in my stomach. Like I might vomit again or something.

MLK Day, however, was the fourth game of my 10-game Hornets package. So, I had to ignore the urge to sleep all day. I'm still trying to take a different person to every game. If you haven't been and want to go, let me know. I finally convinced Tina to attend a Hornets game with me. The 2:30 start time certainly helped.

I wanted to get there early because the first 8,000 fans received David West bobbleheads. Paul got there much earlier than us and kept our spot in line. He's also selling my second D-West bobble on E-bay. The West one, unlike the CP3 one, doesn't quite resemble Mr. West. Ugh. Ironically, Monday's game was the first D-West missed with back spasms.

Tina and I left a little before 1 p.m. Paul called while I was driving to see how far away we were. I tell him about 20 minutes.

Paul: OK. The line is filling up pretty quick.
Me: All right. I'll go fast and hope not to get a speeding ticket.
Tina: Speaking of which. You have our tickets?
Me: Paul, I might be a little longer than 20 minutes. Gotta go back home.

That's right. I left the tickets at the house and had to turn around, which probably cost us 15 minutes. Tina was super excited about my mess up. "Un-fucking-believable. Are you kidding me?" After I retrieved the tickets and we were back on the road for 10 minutes, she said: "I can't believe you forgot the fucking tickets."

I dropped Tina off in front of the Arena and parked. I found Paul and her in line just as they were entering the building. Perfect timing, if you ask me. Plus, the Wasps are now 4-0 in my 10-game package games. On a CP3 buzzer-beater, no less. That was awesome. I think that moment healed my hangover.

Most of the concession places were closed for MLK Day. The few that were open had some long-ass lines. No way I was standing in that. Everyone in this picture is in the Cheeseburger line. It forms a circle.

With D-West down, I was hoping that meant playing time for Ju-Ju. I took a picture of him (he's following through on his shot) during warm-ups. He entered the game late in the third quarter. There was like a 1/4 standing ovation for him. I was in that number. Ju-Ju was even in on defense in crunch time.

Much of the entertainment Monday involved kiddies. There was a Hornets mini-drum line, two separate contests involving mini goals and a youth Hornets hip-hop dance routine. Usually, there's not much kids stuff. Must be a day-game thing. The youngster shown here had trouble dunking. Awww.

During a Honeybees dance segment, Tina turns to me and says: "Is it me or are they fucking up really bad?" (How the heck should I know.)

Another commercial break contest had two dudes dribbling around cones. Each contestant also was playing for a section of the audience to win some free Sonic stuff. The dude who won was playing for section 312, which just happens to be my section. First time I've ever won anything at a game.

Here's the catch, though. The contest took place with less than six minutes remaining in the first half. Some Hornets worker (who didn't know what the prize was) told us that to claim our winnings we had to walk around the building to section 302 before halftime.

What a f'n joke. Hey, you won, folks. Go crazy. But we can't just give you a gift certificate, or whatever. No. You have to get up right now and walk around the Arena and miss part of the game you paid to watch. Bullshit. Hardly anyone from our section got up. Though I think most of them didn't even know we won something.

Paul, always one to claim free stuff, took my ticket (he actually bought a ticket in a different section) and headed over to 302. Did he return with several coupons to Sonic like the lady next to us did? Nope. He found a different prize area, where they took his ticket and gave him a beer. Actually, that's more useful than the expiring Sonic coupons.

That's not the Hornets huddling in the middle of the paint. Nope. That's the team crowded around Tyson, who just went down in a heap. That was a nasty looking fall. I, of course, feared the worse, though later reports indicate he'll return in a couple of weeks. Whew.

Counting D-West, three Hornets were hurt by halftime. I thought it was four, but CP was just sitting out because of foul trouble. I sent Lopes a text that said: Four Hornets hurt. He responded (and quickly): Three cute honeybees, two radio guys and chris paul shoulda been mvp. Ah, the Christmas spirit lives.

During the second half, we had our Paul idiot moment of the week. After CP3 makes a steal, Paul turns to me and asks: "Is Paul's steals streak still alive?" (D, can I get a whistle?)

THE TINA CURSING CORNER

My mom wakes up while I'm watching TV early Thursday morning. I tell her about something. "I don't want to hear your shit right now. Can't you see I just woke up. I didn't hear one word you just said."

At various points today for reasons unknown, mom yelled: "Son of a bitch."

Mom sees pieces of yellow and red construction paper in my coat pocket. "What the fuck is that for?" (I can't tell you, either.)

FOUR CORNERS
A closer look at The Gene Pool World

-- When I woke up Monday, I noticed that my left eye was blood-shot. There was a full, dark red circle to the left of my pupil. I didn't think much of it because it didn't hurt.

On Tuesday afternoon, Tina looked at my eye closely. "Your fucking eye is worse." Actually, each day it has cleared up a little bit more. She keeps urging me to go to the doctor; I'm more inclined to just let it heal itself. I'm fairly certain I popped a blood vessel while throwing up eight times Sunday morning.

-- I'm done with the first season of Spin City using Netflix. Not as good as I thought it would be, but I did enjoy it. My next show to tackle is Lost. The first disc arrived this afternoon. Any show that refers to its season premiere as an "event" has to be excellent, right?

-- I took an opportunity to try to be a bookie at the beginning of the year. Marcus and Jelly had both vowed to stop cursing, and everyone assumed that wouldn't last. So, I took bets as to who would crack first. To my surprise, most all the money came in on Jelly.

Well, January is almost over, and neither one has cussed. Besides making the office much less exciting, the bet has lost all its luster. No one is really concerned with it anymore. I'm calling the whole thing off. It's over.

The breakdown for the betting went like this: If Jelly cursed first, I lose $21. If Marcus succumbs first, I win fifty cents.

-- Volkswagen called Tuesday. It was the same lady who served me the other week and called to follow-up last Tuesday. I could tell she had no recollection of our previous two encounters. In fact, she thought this was the first time she called to ask about my service.

Service rep (assuming): So everything was to your satisfaction?
Me: We played this game last week.
Service rep: Oh, we did?
Me: Yes.
Service rep: Oh, sorry about that. Anything you wanted to add then?
Me: No.

I didn't feel like explaining to her again how she fucked up, mostly because I was tired. As Jelly said: "So, she can't even do that part of her job right."

PARTING SHOTS
I tell Jelly that a Giants receiver got shot.

Liam: Where's Plaxico?

D mourns the firing of the Grizzlies coach.

D: That poor guy. He never had a chance.
Liam: He ain't dead, D.

THE DAILY TOP LIST
My favorite five local personal-injury attorney slogans

5) It's just (snap) that easy. Morris Bart.
The Hornets should have him say that to the crowd before games. Morris: "Beating the Spurs, it's just (snaps finger along with the crowd) that easy."

4) Get the E Guarantee. E. Eric Guirard.
Not exactly sure what that means, but he does have associates.

3) Before you accept a quick check, (rip) check with me. Michael Hingle.
He'll take that 18-wheeler to court, and it won't be so big.

2) When you don't know the law, you need to know Anthony Taormina.
A beautiful jingle.

1) One Call. That's All. Morris Bart.
Classic. I love when his clients tell you how much he won for them.