HOLY VATICAN, BATMAN!

January's Yat-Together was Wednesday at Venezia's. We almost didn't have one this month. Not that that hasn't happened before. But still, we wanted to avoid a miss. And were successful. In attendance to kick off our 2009 festivities: Kelli, Stephen, Bode, Greg and me. We're open to suggestions for future meetings. 

The funniest moment of the evening came when Greg reached for a drink of water. I noticed him stretching to get to the glass. I thought that was odd. Why is his drink so far away? 

As he was pulling the glass close for a sip, Bode cut him off. "What are you doing, man? That's my glass." Bode was right. Greg was confused for a second until he realized his glass was right in front of him. It's always funny when somebody grabs the wrong glass. I do this often myself. 

The main topics of conversation were the current state of TV, Kelli and Stephen's trip to Orlando (Kelli's like fourth time there in the past year) and Bode, Greg and I reminiscing about Rummel. The Orlando trip was during the offseason for vacations, so there weren't any lines. Bastards. I had to wait like 45 minutes to get on the Men in Black ride last March. 

Kelli told a cute school story. She assigned the class to write a paper. Part of the instructions was to have it double-spaced. One of the students was more than confused by this requirement and double-spaced between each word. Kelli couldn't help but laugh at the student. I don't blame her. 

At work, we order from Venezia's quite often. Usually, I split a pizza because it's decent and cheap. But for the Yat-Together, I went large. I ordered the Eggplant Vatican: eggplant covered in a sauce that includes shrimp, crawfish and crab meat with pasta alfredo on the side. 

Sweet mother mercy, it was awesome. That sauce is killer. You can't really ever argue against shrimp, crawfish and crab meat, and the eggplant added the perfect background. Got a solid lunch out of it today, too. 

Bode and Greg ordered a pizza. I felt like I had warped to Saturday night's dinner looking at it. 

THE TINA CURSING CORNER

My mom is rigging a light to work by placing it in the blender. I ask her for the reason. She pulls the light out of the blender to show me. "Look at it. It's broke, dumbass."

Mom just finished cooking. "I can't be next to the stove. It's too fucking hot right now." 

Mom asks me to order some tanning product online. I tell her that it might not be easy to find. "I ask for one fucking thing, and it's like I'm asking for a heart!" 

PARTING SHOTS

Pancho's is reopening on Airline. This brought much joy to the T-P on Thursday. Derry, in particular, was on cloud nine, telling everyone he could find of the news.

Trey: There goes Derry's diet.

Jelly tells us that Joe the Security Guard told her he doesn't always lie when he tells her how beautiful she looks. 

JRap: He thinks my name is Chris. 

Me: C-Rap.

(Jelly and I look at each other. Pause.)

Together: Crap!

D is perturbed at the lack of focus in Finney's column. 

D: Did you see how Finney hopped around? 

Me: That's impressive at his age. 

THE DAILY TOP LIST

My favorite five beer slogans.

5) Always a good choice. Sam Adams. 

It's fun to say. Even if someone doesn't order a Sam Adams. 

4) Why ask why? Try Bud Dry. Budweiser.

I used to repeat this a lot as a child. Had no idea what Bud Dry was. 

3) Hooray Beer! Red Stripe. 

Official beer of the Slackers. 

2) The One and Only. New Castle.

It most certainly is. 

1) Tastes great. Less filling. Miller Lite.

I'm partial to any slogan that reminds me of a catfight.