RUNNING DIARY OF GAME 1 OF CUBS-DODGERS
5:39: Furcal strikes out on 2-2 pitch in the dirt. Thanks for the help.
5:40: Tony Gwynn tells us that the Cubs defense needs to make plays when the ball is put in play. Gee really. I thought they were just out there to look pretty.
5:41: Dumpster is rocking a pretty thick beard there. I wonder if he's refusing to cut it until the end of the playoffs.
5:42: Dumpster doesn't get a close 2-2 call and then Martin checks his swing on 3-2. Also, the TBS broadcasters bring up Dumpster's delivery. Did you know his strange glove movement is legal? No. I thought every ump the whole year was letting him cheat.
5:43: Manny steps up. And grounds into a double play on the second pitch. Hot Damn! He's the scariest thing in the series. So far, so good.
5:46: The Cubs lineup is shown. Fukudome second? What in Japanese technology is Lou doing that for? He's been benched for two months, and now you put him in the No. 2 hole in the first playoff game? Must be trying to push those proverbial buttons broadcasters are always talking about.
5:47: Soriano strikes out on two terrible swings. That's his weakness. Let's hope that was just too much anxiousness and he is more patient as the series continues.
5:49: Dick Stockton tells me Fuku is in there for defense, according to Lou. No shit. But why is he hitting second? The decision pays immediate dividends when Fuku taps out to the first baseman.
5:50: Besides Manny, Derek Lowe is the other thing that scares me in this series. He's a big-time playoff pitcher and throws a lot of breaking balls, which many Cub hitters struggle with.
5:51: Gwynn tells us the Cub hitters know how to work the count. That has been true this season. They have taken a shitload of walks (636). On cue, Lee lays off some decent sliders off the plate and takes a walk on a 3-2 pitch.
5:52: Who is this third man in the booth?
5:54: A-Ram-Ram bounces out to third. That's the end of the first inning of Game 1. Each team got a walk, and that was it. I'm so nervous my fingers are shaking a little bit as I type these words.
5:57: Stockton tells us that the all-time series between the teams is even at 1,012-1,012. You know what that means? This game is bigger than just Game 1 of the NLDS. This is bigger than the start of a World Series march and the end of 100 years of frustration. The winner of this game has the all-time series lead. That's bragging rights, people.
5:58: Dumpster walks the leadoff guy. His second walk. Not good. This ump has a tight strike zone low.
6:00: Loney swings at a bad pitch and pops up to second. That'll help.
6:01: Stockton tells us the crowd is apprehensive. The third guy in the booth tells us the fans are hoping nothing bad happens. He's right. But the fans can't just sit there and wait for something crazy to happen. After all, this is 2008. 100 years, baby. Get loud, bitches.
6:03: The crowd comes alive with an 0-2 count and two outs. Stockton: "It's not a late arriving crowd, but it's a late reacting crowd." Interesting. Dumpster gets out the inning.
6:04: In case you are wondering why I am calling him Dumpster, that stems from when he was in the bullpen and made me cry most of the times he took the ball. Liam and I started calling him Dumpster because he pitched like garbage. Even though he's been the man this year, I like the name, and I'm sticking to it.
6:05: I see a Papa John's commercial. Thanks for the reminder. Time to order. I have to bite the delivery fee, though. I'm not leaving this spot. Stupid four-plus dollars.
6:06: Did you know that there is only one October? Cuz they just reminded us again.
6:07: Edmonds has been so key for this team. I'm almost expecting him to homer here.
6:08: OK. So he didn't homer. But he hit it hard for the first hit of the game. I shouldn't be giving this away because I know so many people are reading, but here's how you pitch Edmonds: Don't throw anything low and away. Ever.
6:09: HOME RUN!!!!!!! Damn. I was one batter off. When DeRosa hit it, I thought that's a foul ball not very deep. But when I saw his reaction, I could tell he thought he hit it out. Then, it was just a matter of staying fair. Which it did. Barely. CUBS 2-0. That boy good.
6:12: Dumpster gets a hit. He looked first pitch fastball. Got it. And smacked it. After I finish typing that, the third guy in the booth makes that point. Put me in there.
6:14: DeRosa's bomb reminds me of a not-so-good at-bat he had in last year's playoffs. In Game 3 (the Cubs down in the series 2-0), we were down 3-1 in the fifth inning. The bases were loaded, and there was one out. The count was 3-1. The D'Backs had just walked two guys in a row. You have to take on 3-1. But DeRosa swung and grounded into a double play. Ballgame. That homer sort of makes up for that.
6:15: I put in my Papa John's order. I feel ashamed for paying that ridiculous delivery charge. Since I know they added four-plus bucks to the total to deliver, do I still have to tip the delivery guy?
6:17: There's that Fuku defense. He stumbles on the bullpen mound and still makes the catch. Nobody else on the team if in right field makes that play. I agreed that he should be in Game 1 for defense. I still want to know why he's hitting No. 2.
6:19: This ump is absolutely (Derry word) killing me. Can Dumpster get a strike?
6:20: Dumpster walks his third guy. One in each inning. And this time it's the pitcher after being ahead 1-2. In Dumpster's defense, the ump could have pumped Lowe on the 2-2 pitch. The announcers didn't give us this stat, but Dumpster has issued like four walks with the bases loaded this season.
6:22: Dumpster is up, up, up. Walks Furcal. Stockton tells us that Dumpster has walked three hitters now. He must be getting old. Damn. He said three walks again. It's four, numnutz. Let's see if he ever corrects himself. I'm guessing not.
6:26: Martin hits a deep fly to left. He hops, and I take a big gulp. But the wind knocks it down for Soriano to catch it on the warning track. That was scary.
6:27: Manny steps up with two on and two out. Here we go.
6:28: When talking about Lou's strategy against Manny, Stockton refers to Lou as Torre. He corrects himself that time. Manny hits a grounder in the hole and beats Theriot's throw to first. Bases juiced, two outs. Ethier striding to the plate.
6:31: Ethier strikes out on a 3-2 splitter that was a ball. Almost walked in a run. Did Dumpster set a record for most pitches in an inning without allowing a run at 32? What about in the playoffs? What about the division series? Cubs playoff record? Something?
6:37: The pizza gets here. Mom is not happy about having to answer the door while I'm watching the game.
6:39: The announcers talk about A-Ram-Ram being a serious MVP candidate. Strange. I haven't heard or read one word about him in that discussion. He promptly grounds into an inning-ending double play. After 3 innings. Cubs 2-0.
6:47: Dodgers get a bloop single, but that's it in top of 4th. I like that Bon Jovi is providing the soundtrack for the playoffs. Awesome.
6:56: Cubs get two two-out hits, but Dumpster comes up and gives us the goofiest at-bat I've seen in some time. He tried to bunt the first pitch on which he had to take two running steps to reach. Then he swung and missed miserably at two pitches that were just a bit outside. We go to the fifth. Cubs 2-0.
7:01: They show a graphic with the names of the announcers. The mystery third man in the booth is Ron Darling. I'll probably get flack, but I have no idea who the heck that is.
7:02: Dumpster allows his fifth walk. Ball 4 was a strike again. The pitch was just as much outside as a pitch to Lee a few innings ago that was called a strike. Consistency, please?
7:03: Darling makes a good point. I've made it before myself. But I haven't heard a broadcaster say it. Dumpster is 14-3 at home this season. But he started 10-0.
7:06: Did Dick Stockton just say forbodden? I think he did. Get this guy out of here.
7:07: I like this Ron Darling guy. He just described Manny as "Sampson with a bat." TBS. Very funny.
7:09: Manny walks. That's six walks for Dumpster. Apparently, Stockton figured out the count. But I don't think he ever realized he was wrong before. First and second, two out for Ethier. This is so nerve-racking!
7:10: Dumpster's 100th pitch makes the count 2-1 to Ethier. Seventh walk.
7:15: GRAND SLAM. JAMES F'N LONEY. Dumpster got ahead of him 0-2 on two awesome pitches. But then he left the 1-2 pitch over the plate, and Loney hit it out to center. Mother trucker. Kemp doubles, and Dumpster is taken out. Oh yeah. That sumbitch Loney barely tipped an 0-2 pitch to stay alive.
7:16: This shit ain't over. How many times have we seen the Cubs rally this season?
7:19: Marshall comes in and gets a swinging strike to end the top of the fifth.
7:25: Kelly calls me to ask if I'd been to Target lately.
7:28: Kelly still is talking to me about Office stuff at Target for a dollar. Lee grounds into an inning-ending double play. Why are fans booing? Terrible.
7:32: My conversation with Kelly ends.
7:38: After a visit from Soto and the pitching coach, Marshall gets out of the sixth.
7:42: A-Ram-Ram leads off the sixth by smacking a double off the wall in center. Here we go, boys.
7:45: Soto takes a fastball for strike 2 in his wheelhouse. Then strikes out on a breaking ball, which is his weakness. What a shame. The announcers were talking about Soto moving the runner over to try to get a run. Obviously, they don't know the Cubs don't understand that concept.
7:48: Stockton: "The Cubs waste a leadoff double by Ramirez, and the Dodgers lead 4-2."
7:53: Manny homers. Low 2-2 pitch gulfed out. Jeez.
7:59: Marshall makes more good pitches to get the next three hitters. 7th inning stretch. TBS goes to commercial. So I'll sing myself. Aren't you glad this is being typed? "Take me out to the ballgame ... If they don't win it's a shame. Cuz it's 1-2-3 strikes you're out at the old ballgame." ... LET'S GET SOME RUNS. Specifically, we need three runs.
8:07: Two strikes in a row to Fuku after a 2-0 count. Both pitches would have been a ball earlier.
8:08: Fuku swings at ball 3 to end the seventh. One baserunner three innings in a row.
8:14: Does Tom Verducci work for Sports Illustrated? I think he does.
8:18: A ball by Samardizja makes a count 2-1. Is it just me or was that pitch called a strike to Fuku the inning before? Tell me I'm not going crazy. Jeff gets out of the inning but allows a run. DODGERS 6, CUBS 2 heading to the bottom of the eighth. That doesn't read right.
8:28: Stockton does it again. He says the Cubs have only one hit since the fifth inning. "And that was Ramirez's double to lead off the sixth." It's like Fontenot didn't get a pinch-hit single in the 7th. Except that he did.
8:30: End of the eighth. Edmonds flies out to the warning track to end the inning. One baserunner again.
8:34: Martin homers. 7-2. Excuse me for a minute while I head to the bathroom.
8:36: Back. Stockton: "Do you guys remember when Wrigley Field was ever this quiet?" Darling and Gwynn: "No." I do. How about from November to March? It's pretty quiet during those months. But seriously, what a dumb question. It's like they don't remember the NLCS in 2003. Don't think there was too much shouting at the end of the eighth inning of Game 6.
8:41: I'm not going to bother with the bottom of the ninth. The Dodgers win Game 1 easily. Am I worried? Of course. But I do think the winner of Game 2 wins the series. They'll split in Los Angeles. Dumpster would pitch lights out in a Game 5. The Cubs did get a lot of hits, just not in a row, except the second inning. Peace out.
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