SMACKDOWN MY VOTE

My polling booth is two streets over. It's one of the few remaining booths at a house. The lady who checked me in said they closed them all down in Kenner. The best part about this polling place is that there is no line in which to wait. I was the only person at the booth at 1:20 p.m. The lady told me the longest line she had seen all day was seven. I was No. 175 to vote of the 360 registered voters in the neighborhood.

This is where the line would form if there was a line. The only traffic I encountered at the voting booth was the family's dog who greeted me halfway up the walkway. Can you believe that the family that runs this booth also has the last name Guillot? Crazy, huh?

This was the first time I voted for a major party candidate in a presidential election. I voted for Nader in 2004. I won't tell you who I voted for, but I will tell you I was tempted to vote for neither of the major party candidates. Instead I almost clicked on Gene Amondson of Alaska. He has the same first name as me. We could use a Gene in the White House. Yes we could, my friends. He's of the Prohibitionist party. 

FYI, Wikipedia updated that Obama was the president elect three minutes (10:04) after CNN declared Obama as the 44th president of these United States. Slow pokes. 

THE TINA CURSING CORNER

My mom knocks on my door at 10:20 a.m. She's pissed.

Mom: You're just not going to go? (Referring to my dentist appointment at noon. More on that below.)

Me: What time is it?

Mom: 11:20.

Me: Are you sure?

Mom: Oh. Wait. I keep forgetting to change the fucking clock in my car. 

Mom looks at my bill from the dentist office. "That's what happens when you have no fucking insurance." Thirty seconds later. "You better get your fucking insurance. It doesn't cost much to put one more fucking person on there. You been working there for seven fucking years."

I tell mom there might be a problem with a tooth of mine. "He's (our dentist) fucking up our mouths. What the fuck is going on?"

Mom doesn't like my penmanship on an envelope I sent in the mail. "You work inside of a fucking office. This is pathetic."

Mom gives her opinion on the election. "If he (McCain) dies, you know who becomes president? Someone who don't know shit. What has she been? Governor for two fucking years? You got to be fucking crazy. That is the worst fucking move in the world."

About thirty minutes later. "Who in their right fucking mind would vote for McCain and Palin? If he dies, she'll be president for four fucking years."

CROWN MY ASS

I went to the dentist today for a checkup. My hygienist Mrs. Cheryl and I discuss the poor condition of my mom's teeth. Mrs. Cheryl: "Her bottoms are fine. It's just the uppers. It makes me sad to see." I responded: "So, her uppers are downers?"

Mrs. Cheryl said most of mom's problems can be attributed to smoking. Her advice: "Don't floss and smo. ... Wait a second. I mean floss and don't smoke." I told her I'm going with her first instinct. No more flossing.

The dentist office is on the fourth floor of the Capital One building on Vets. They've been operating out of this building since Katrina destroyed their old office. They've called this office temporary since my first visit in the fall of '05. On Tuesday, Mrs. Cheryl guaranteed for the third consecutive visit that my next visit will be in the new building on Causeway. We'll see.

Me: When are ya'll supposed to move in there?

Mrs. Cheryl: Well, we were supposed to move in there Oct. 31. But something happened.

Me: Oh. So ya'll got tricked?

As for my checkup, my teeth are clean. Spread the word. Unfortunately, I have a tooth on my left side that is crooked and has a large gap where bacteria can build up and eventually eat at the nerve of the tooth. That not good. I had a filling on the tooth to help with this situation back in 2006. None of this problem is my fault, they tell me. I had Mrs. Cheryl explain the situation using dentistry terms.

Dr. Mancuso (that's my dentist) came in and agreed with Mrs. Cheryl. He suggested I get a crown put in to straighten the tooth and eliminate the gap. I said in a knowledgeable voice: "You know, doc. I concur. We did a distal occlusal back in '06 on this tooth. It helped, but now the gap is susceptible to bacteria and will eventually eat at the root." Dr. Mancuso responded: "No wonder your mom comes in here and says you're aggravating."

The crown would cost $800 without insurance. Dr. Mancuso said it's not an emergency, but it's something I should definitely have done down the road. Oh boy. On a lighter note, I took my first X-rays using digital equipment. It was cool watching the image pop up immediately on the computer screen. Didn't lower the cost, however. 

FANTASY FEVER

The Gene Poolers are in a tie for second after a loss last week. I played without my top two running backs (LDT and Gore). I still have the most points by about 10. Here are the records in my league: 8-1, 5-4, 5-4, 4-5, 4-5, 4-5, 4-5, 2-7. 

The Dos Agateers have won two in a row. This week, we go for .500. Though we had to pick up yet another quarterback. We got the best option available, and it was Brady Quinn? Our other quarterbacks this year have been Brady, Cassel, Edwards and Orton.

PARTING SHOTS

D is looking at pictures of Jack on the Net. That's Jelly's 1-year-old. Jack is playing around.

D: He's sure got a lot of stuff.

(Jelly walks over to see the pics D is looking at.)

Jelly: That's the Children's Museum.

Some students are shown cheering at an election party.

Lopes: I'm pretty sure that's at Xavier.

D: What they cheering for?

Bake: They got free pizza, too.

Lopes and I see that Ohio has been declared for Obama. 

Lopes and me at the same time: Ballgame.

THE DAILY TOP LIST

2008 is the year posting a facebook status became all the rage. I read these things just about every day because it helps me keep up with people's lives. I also count the number of "my friends" who posted a status on a particular topic. Here are the top five most posted about moments this year. (Note: I have 126 friends on facebook.)

5) New Year's. 

I don't remember the number.

Was I in that number? Yes.

4) LSU national championship.

Number of people: 21.

Was I in that number? Yes.

3) Hornets lose Game 7 to Spurs.

Number: 26.

Was I in that number? No. 

2) Gustav approaches.

Number: 32.

Was I in that number? Yes.

1) Presidential election.

Number: 40.

Was I in that number? No.