RAIN. RAIN. GO AWAY. COME AGAIN ANOTHER DAY.

In a top list the other day, my No. 1 fear was of rain. I said I'll explain later in the comment. Welcome to later. 

It's not so much a fear of rain as it is a fear of flooding. Whenever they flash those, um, flash flood warnings, I take those seriously. If they take place in the middle of the night (as they often do), I can't go to sleep but remain fixated on the TV screen. I flip between all the local stations for the latest updates. I rock back and forth in my chair. 

Many times I wait until the threat is completely gone before falling asleep. Other times I manage to go nighty night but only by putting a second pillow on top of the ear that isn't on the regular pillow. I always feel relieved when it storms while I'm at work (can't hear much outside) or while I'm sound asleep because then I don't have to worry about it. 

My fear of flooding started on May 9, 1995, when the New Orleans area was hit with an actual flash flood. It basically came out of nowhere at night. I was 11 and scared to death. 

We opened the front door in the middle of the downpour. Our street was a river. I could see the raging water gushing down the street and getting closer to our doorstep. 

Tina promised that if I went to sleep like a good boy that it would all be gone when I woke up. I brought a blanket and a pillow into the dining room and curled up with Tina near watching a soap opera. I was able to fall asleep quite easily that night. 

After getting nudged awake some time later, I thought that the plan had worked. However, Tina said these words to me: "Wake up, honey. You're sleeping in water." Yup, I was just a tad bit wet. 

When all was said and done, the water cut off at the top of our doorstep. You could see the line where the water stopped, a mere inch from going over the top and into the living room. The water in the dining room came in through cracks in the wall. The carpet and the sheetrock in that room were ruined. 

Fortunately, that was the extent of our damage. We fixed that the next week. The damage to my psyche, however, still exists. For the first two years after the flood, I freaked out when it rained hard. I don't freak out anymore, but I always think about the possibility of it happening again. 

May 3, 1978. May 9, 1995. May 15, 2012? 

THE TINA CURSING CORNER

My mom wished she had taken a different career path while driving Wednesday. "I should have gone to work for Victor Manning so I can teach these kids how to fucking drive. Lord knows they can't as adults." 

Mom talked to dad earlier Wednesday. "Your dad has so much fucking bullshit with him. He tells me he likes to go to every first Friday of Jazz Fest. In 20 fucking years, I think we went once. I'm like 'Who the fuck he thinks he's talking to?' " 

The tree trunk pieces left a stain on our pavement. "Once I pressure washed that spot, I had to do the whole fucking thing. It's a good thing I didn't go with the other guy. The stain would be the whole fucking driveway." 

Mom had a light bulb go off. "I found the perfect place for you to meet a girl and do all your fucking laptop shit. Go to a coffee place. You don't have to get coffee. You can get yourself a soda and sit there and do all your stuff on that fucking laptop." 

In the land of TV

-- On Kate seeing Jack playing football on Lost: "I can't wait for the new disc to arrive. Kate's like 'I risked my fucking life for this guy, and the motherfucker is playing football?' "

-- On Tony's actions on 24: "Tony did all that bullshit for one canister?" 

FOUR CORNERS

A closer look at The Gene Pool World.

-- I get really nervous when a cop is driving behind me. I can't enjoy the music that is playing and just stare at the cop until one of us turns. I guess I'm scared I'll randomly get pulled over. 

On the way to the Hornets game the other day, I had just hit 50 mph on Airline (speed limit 40) when I noticed a cop behind me. I quickly dropped down to 42 mph. 

-- The Chiefs have drafted three LSU players in a row (Bowe, Dorsey, Jackson) in the first round. However, I couldn't find anywhere if that was the first time in history a team took a player from the same school three years in a row in the first round. 

So, I looked it up myself. An hour and a half later, I had my answer. This was the first time in history. Woohoo! Here's some other fascinating findings I discovered in this research: 

1) Besides the Chiefs-LSU, an NFL team has drafted from the same school two years in a row in the first round 24 other times, including six other times this decade. 1970s-1990s: 6. Pre 1970s: 12. 

2) The Saints did it with Georgia (Charles Grant and Johnathan Sullivan) in 2002 and 2003.

3) If the Jaguars had drafted Percy Harvin this year, they would have duplicated the Chiefs-LSU feat with Florida players. 

-- Gillie did a post on her blog recently about literally burning childhood documents (tests, notes from boyfriends, etc.). In the background of one of the pictures she posted, I saw the issue of the Maroon when our president Bernie Knoth resigned amid sexual allegations. 

I left her a comment saying how dare you burn that historic edition of our college days. I went back the other day and noticed she responded to me. Turns out, she didn't burn that issue. She said she would never burn that issue. Good.  

-- I tried to watch HBO the other day in my room. It was turned off. Cox Cable Bastards. 

PARTING SHOT

Brick is editing a prep baseball story and making fun of it Tuesday night. 

Brick: This guy hit a screaming line drive. 

Marcus: Must have looked at Gene.

THE DAILY TOP LIST

My favorite five songs that came from a TV show episode. 

5) Road to Rhode Island. Brian and Stewie. Family Guy. 

Whatever dangers we may face, we'll never fear or cry

Until we're syndicated, FOX will never let us die. (Please.)

4) Fetus Song. Phoebe. Friends. 

Are you in there little fetus? In nine months will you come greet us? ... I will buy you some adidas. 

3) Shipoopi. Peter. Family Guy. 

Squeeze her once when she isn't lookin'

Get a squeeze back, that's fancy cookin'

2) Everything Comes Down To Poo. Turk and J.D. Scrubs. 

It may sound gross. You may say shush.

But we need to see what comes out of your tush. 

1) Can't Touch Me. Peter. Family Guy. 

I'm presidential Peter. Interns think I'm hot.

Don't care if you're handicap, I'll still park in your spot.