FEELS LIKE THE FIRST TIME

After finishing work and my blog Friday night, I headed out to meet Chuck and the Uptown ladies for a drink at Miss Mae's. Since the start of my college days, I have become quite familiar with Miss Mae's. It's always in the paper when it lists the top places in the city to drink. I've heard the Uptown ladies, especially Gillie, speak of it like it was "fucking Mecca." While I was on campus, I often overheard people discussing going there or what happened there to them the night before.

Except by some strange miracle, I had never stepped foot in the establishment. The Uptown ladies were aghast. Gillie: "How could you have never been here? It's like we're not even friends. Who are you?" (At right: See the girl in the black? She and her friends are regulars at Bruno's. Paul likes to point out when she walks into the bar. We're kind of obsessed with her even though neither of us finds her very attractive. She bobs around to every song that comes on at Bruno's. She also giggles a lot.)

As a whole, I came away liking this Miss Mae's. Nice setup. Couple of pool tables. And the best drink special ever: $1 well drinks 24-7. Is it possible to get drunk for cheaper? Shame on me for not taking advantage of this in college.

Sometime around 1:30 a.m., somebody in the group suggests we score some grub. We head over to Camelia Grille because Kaila says it closes at 3 a.m. Four of the seven of us are standing outside at 1:50 a.m. The guy who seats people comes outside.

GWSP: Is this ya'lls whole group?

Gillie: No. We have three more coming.

GWSP: Well, are they close? Because I'm closing the door in ten minutes. (I guess Kaila was wrong about that 3 a.m. closing time.) And no one will be allowed in there after that.

Gillie: No. They are close.

GWSP: They better hurry. And ya'll better come in right now and order.

Chuck, Jenna and Gillie don't eat because, well, they weren't hungry. They sit down on the couch to hang out and be near the beautiful people, like me, who are eating.

GWSP: So you three are not eating?

Gillie: No. We're just going to hang out.

GWSP: OK. But understand you can't change your mind. We're closing t

he kitchen in two minutes, and you won't be able to order. So don't go changing your mind. I won't be able to help you.

Gillie: OK. We won't.

At left: Chuck, Jenna and Gillie moved from the couch to seats by Stu, one of Gillie's friends visiting from Virginia. He had to sit away from Kaila, me and Johnny (other friend of Gillie's) because of the crowd and the place closing soon. At right: This is the scene on the way to the bathroom at Camelia Grille. You pass the area where they clean the pots and pans and then this area. As Jenna said as we walked to our respective restrooms: "I don't think we should be back here." She's right. It seems like the area should be for employee's only. But I guess they don't have any other choice.

THE TINA CURSING CORNER

Mom is talking about Tropical Storm Fay. "Fucking Florida is flooded."
Mom found two funny stories in the paper. In the first one, a guy with a half a pound of weed in a backpack had the backpack stolen. He tells the police his bag with $400 was stolen. The cops catch the robbers. The guy who reported it got arrested for having weed and filing a false report. "If that was me, I would have just said, 'I'm fucked out of a half a pound of weed.' What a stupid ass. They got some funny shit in the paper."

In the second story, a 60-something-year-old man was arrested for having child porn on his computer. "The dick tells the cop he didn't know that was illegal."

BRINGING POLLUTION DOWN TO ZERO

Some time ago, Harahan stopped picking up recycling to make extra 

room in the budget. You know, if we stop trying to save the earth, those other things we're spending money on won't be worth a damn with no livable land. Anyway, to do my part to keep the world going, I've been collecting my water bottles I use at work on the passenger floor of my car. On my way to Miss Mae's Friday night, I dumped this load off in Chuck's recycling bin outside his house. I put 14 bottles in the recyling. Later, I noticed I missed one. Hope you don't mind, Chuckles.

My mom is not a fan of me stocking up bottles in my car. She noticed the stack the other day: "What are you doing with all these water bottles? Nobody can put their fucking feet down in your car."

DAMN. COLLEGE FOOTBALL STARTS SOON.

1) Lou Holtz still is employed by ESPN. I can't comprehend this. He is the worst talking head in the history of ESPN. He's old. You can't understand him most of the time. And he thinks he's the PR guy for Notre Dame. He picks them to win every game, including against Southern Cal last season. Mark May should be canonized as a saint for only rolling his eyes and not punching him square in the face. Today, I'm watching that College show they have. He is picking the Irish to win 11 games this year. C'mon. The only explanation I can think of for him still being there: ESPN knows he sucks, and they think it helps ratings to have people loving to hate him.

2) On the same show, Kirk Herbstreit picked Florida to win (and I quote) "its second national championship in three years." See that, Marcus? Herbstreit uses "my math." 

PARTING SHOTS

Jelly is reading over the news in briefs for page 2.

Jelly: Some no name won a tennis tournament. What am I supposed to put in the headline: Seedless so-and-so wins?
Derry: You can. Just don't tell his wife.


"I'm going to go engrave my name on the door in stone and bang my head on it."

- BRAVES MAN to Jelly while I was listening in. That poor man has had it rough with the Braves this season. By the way, we've learned two new tidbits about him recently: 1) His wife works at the Golden Corral and 2) He's a softball coach (keep in mind, he has poor eyesight.)

On Friday night, the GWSP also chimed in on Michael Phelps.

"All he needs to do to be rich is sell those fucking gold medals. Then he can fucking retire."

THE DAILY TOP LIST
As promised recently, my favorite TV theme songs. I have 80 of these babies on my iPod. I narrowed it down to the top 11.

11) Saved by the Bell.
"Ridin' low in my chair, she won't know that I'm there; if I can hand it (homework) in tomorrow, it'll be all right."

10) The Odd Couple.

9) Still Standing.
"You can read me baby like an open book; stop me dead in my tracks with only just one look."

8) Family Ties.
"What would we do baby without us?"

7) Psych.
"In between the lines, there's a lot of obscurity; I'm not inclined to resign to maturity."

6) Welcome Back Kotter.
"Yeah, we tease him a lot cuz we got him on the spot; Welcome back."

5) The King of Queens.
"But I don't care cuz all I want to do; is cash my check and drive right home to you."

4) Friends
"It's like you're always stuck in second gear; when it hasn't been your day, your week, your month or even your year."

3) The Fresh Prince of Bel-Air.
"When a couple of guys who were up to no good; started making trouble in my neighborhood."

2) Cheers.
"Making your way in the world today takes everything you've got; taking a break from all your worries sure would help a lot."

1) Sanford & Son.
Also TV's favorite theme. I've seen characters on other shows do this theme countless times. Marcus and D, hope this makes up for the show's rank on the top TV shows list.