BETEEN ME AND YOU

On the way out the building Thursday night, I noticed a sign posted on the door of the cafeteria. That can only mean one thing: They're going to be stripping and waxing floors at some point this weekend. I was right; it's happening Sunday. 

Actually, a sign such as that posted also can mean something else: The cleaning crew person who posted it has a 50-50 shot at making a mistake somewhere on the sign. And this my friends landed on the good side of that 50-50. 

Turns out, leaving the "w" out isn't that uncommon of a mistake. I googled the word beteen, and it yielded 103,000 results, with the first page of stuff all involving the between misspelled as beteen. 

THE TINA CURSING CORNER

Paul let my mom borrow his seasons of Entourage. Not surprisingly, she loves the show. "I need to own this. It's fucking great." 

Mom is frustrated with my lack of production. "Don't want to lift a fucking finger." 

Mom and I are discussing friend finder on the Internet. I tell her if you google friend finder, you also get results for adult friend finder. "That's for fuck buddies?" 

Mom went to Wal-Mart today. Her first curse about that place in a while: "Fucking Wal-Mart. I bet there were five things I couldn't get. Fucking out. Such bullshit." 

THE STUPID CALLERS: FROM THE FILES OF T-P SPORTS

Like the Naked Gun title.

Brick received a call Thursday night about a recent sports murder. 

Caller: Did Andre Ware get killed a couple weeks ago?

Brick: No. Steve McNair. 

PARTING SHOT

I had to be the last one left watching the Pirates-Cubs 17-2 game in the ninth inning. 

Bob: To this day, I even wear a jockstrap to watch games. It's just more comfortable. 

Len (after a pause): T-M-I.